i'm just in it for the clothes and the food

surrealism in black cordura

I’ve just had a terribly surreal moment.

My best friend from college is also in the Army, currently overseas. When he came home for mid-tour leave, he lent me his drop-leg holster for my M9, which he doesn’t need because he’s carrying an M16. The drop length was a little too short, and I couldn’t extend it far enough to make it comfortable, so the first couple of times I wore it, at the range, it was pulling on my belt in a very annoying manner. So today, I went shopping here on post and picked up an extender. I just put it on. I’m sitting here typing, wearing a holster strapped to my leg, and aside from getting jabbed in the lower ribs just a tiny bit, it’s quite comfortable.

My moment of surrealism came when I looked down at my leg and realized that that is what my leg will look like for the next year. 

This is what it looks like from the side.  (The weapon is locked in the arms room, so the holster is empty.)

For the next year, whenever I get up to go anywhere, no matter what I’m doing, I will be wearing this holster. I will constantly be armed. In the potty, at the shower point, at chow, at work… everywhere. I will never not have a gun strapped to my leg. (Or possibly under my arm; I might get a shoulder holster to wear with PT clothes, which have no belt. But still…)

I’m glad I spent the $7 to make this thing comfortable. If it’s going to be on me all the time, it needs to be.

one down, one to go.

Completed training in TCP/ECP (tactical control point/entry control point) and QRF.  Not much to tell about it, except that it was hot out there (drank my entire 3l Camelbak in just a couple of hours), and I got pictures.  I only have to complete MOUT training on Thursday, and I'm done.

better now

I had a nice little chat with the ops sergeant today, and he's going to look out for me.  I'll get my leave.  And all it's costing me is some Red Sox merchandise -- small price to pay for time with my family.  He's a good man; he really looks after the soldiers at Alpha Company. It's a good thing to find.  I told him about my having studied karate and how close I was to my blackbelt, and he wants me to do a class at PT.  I'm thinking simple jiu-jitsus, hold breaks, that sort of thing.

Wolfie is here, and he looks like he could use a snuggle.  I've had a strenuous week; I know I could.  The ballistic plates in my armor have a curve to them that results in the back plate sitting right on my waist -- I'm going to have a groove worn in my back before I get home, I swear.  I'm making it a goal to DX (direct exchange) my uniforms and vest at least once before I get home... my BDUs are already almost falling off my hips (YAY!), and I got my DCUs months ago, before I lost all this weight.

I found some pictures of myself that were taken at Fort Jackson.  I've lost a lot of weight.  I still have a ways to go, but I can now pull my smaller pair of jeans off over my hips and butt without undoing them, which is my criteria for buying a smaller size.  :-)

Two more training events, and I'm done.  Strange to think of moving on to the Next Big Thing, but there you are... it always comes, whether you're ready or not.  At least I'm not terrified and depressed like I was.

I've been pissy lately, though, and I think I know why: apprehension.  I know a few people in my unit, but by no means all, and that scares me a little.  I don't know for sure if I'm going forward to Iraq or not, and that scares me a little.  I'll be fine; I just have to address the real source of my issues.  At least I'm learning to be honest with myself.

sad

I don't know when I'm going overseas, but I constantly feel like my leave is in jeopardy.  I need to spend time with my husband before I fly.  I just do.  He's my whole world, and honestly, if I'd known he was in my future, I would have done things a lot different in my twenties to get ready to be with him... and I'm not sure that the Army would have been part of it.

But it is, and I realize that I have to make the best of it.  I was promised leave as a condition of taking this assignment, though, and I simply must have it.  I know I'm not the only soldier with these issues, but I don't live in their skulls, I live in mine, and the environment in here is entirely devoted to my husband.  They can't ask me to leave him for a year and not let me see him before I go.

They can't.

But they might.

Sad now.

a nice walk spoiled

And I don't mean golf.  I finished my land navigation class today, with the practical exercise.  The classroom stuff was yesterday -- I'd been already, three weeks ago, and managed to trip in the woods during a familiarization exercise and sprain my ankle.  My last day on profile was the 30th, so I hopped right back in the saddle.

The dismounted (walking portion) was the most intense, because the points were so far apart.  Think orienteering, with a military twist.  I figure we walked about three klicks today, made a little farther because we got off azimuth.  Luckily we ran into a point marker from a different course that had a grid coordinate on it, so I grabbed the map, plotted that point, and determined the azimuth to where we needed to be, and we were off.

It wouldn't have been such a big deal, but the terrain, while flat, was still challenging because of thick undergrowth and some serious deadfalls.  I did see lots of wildlife today, though, or at least signs of it.  There was deer and rabbit scat everywhere.  ;-)  And I saw a woodchuck.  They're pretty thick on the ground at Ft Dix, too.

I also got a little reminder of my childhood: I found a ladyslipper.  They're a type of orchid, and they're awfully rare, so they're not allowed to be transplanted or harvested.  When I was very small (and possibly before I was born), my mom didn't know this, and transplanted some from the woods near our house to the front of the house, and always told me not to touch them, for fear that they'd be damaged.  I was so thrilled to see it, though, that I took a picture. 

The mounted portion was pretty easy, too, once we got to the right place.  We had to drive overland to get to the road that leads to the ranges.  When we got to the hardball, I pointed up the road and said "There's Range Road, it's right there."  The guys insisted that we could get there easier by taking a tank trail.  Excuse me, which of us had driver's training back there not three or four months ago, and which of us have been at Ft Dix for three weeks?  So we took the tank trail.

Five miles later, we're in Browns Mills.  In a residential area.  In a Humvee.  We went back up to Range Road, into the training area where the course was, and were done in maybe thirty minutes.  We were back in just over an hour -- would have been back in 35, maybe 45 minutes if they'd listened to me.  Oh well, we were a go for both stations, so all's well that ends well.

Other photos from land nav:
We walked by this disused "internment camp" training area on our way to getting lost.  I thought it made a rather striking photo.

My teammates, checking the azimuth.  My ankle was playing up a bit, so this is my usual vantage point.  Better slow than quitting, I always say.

SFC V, aka Papi, rockin' the PLGR. 

intro

Hi, my name is Captain Dooley.  I'm 36 years old, and I'm from a town in northeastern Massachusetts, not far from the New Hampshire border.  I've been in the Army since I was 19, and I've been an officer in the Transportation Corps since I was 21.  I got out for a while in 2000, but I "got a letter in the mail, said "go to war, or go to jail..."  (That's a line from a marching cadence.  They were talking about the draft, but it seriously fits.)  I've been on active duty since October 18th, 2004, leaving my husband of only four months at home without me.

I was at Fort Jackson, SC, for about three weeks, and then Fort Eustis, VA for five weeks, while I took a two-week transportation branch refresher.  (Don't ask... but it did mean I got both Veteran's Day and Thanksgiving off.)  Then I got to Fort Dix, NJ, on December 12, 2004.  I joined the 890th Transportation Company, but for a variety of reasons, did not deploy with them.  I was on administrative hold for three months, working at the Installation Operations Center (LOVED that job), until I got the word that I was to deploy with the 1398th Deployment Support Brigade.  So now, I'm finishing up the training I did not complete with the 890th, and getting ready to fly out to the big sandbox.

There are details about my time here at Fort Dix that I want to record, but that can wait till later -- I have someplace I have to be.  In the meantime, I'll leave you with my JOLLY BOOTS OF DOOOOOOOOM!